AntiNEC

2004/10/28(木)09:30

Just call me the Salesman

I think I should get paid for more than just my one job here. I'm supposed to just be a tech guy here...help customers with their internet, fix computers, maintain the database, blah blah blah. But since I work later than anyone else (its 6:15pm, and Im the only one here...how sad is that), sometimes I get calls from people who want to get our service for the first time. Sorry, but in my job description it doesnt say anything about selling the product. But, the great guy that I am, I put on my nicest voice and my plaid jacket and start selling. Like just a few minutes ago, it went like this: Guy: Hi. I'm in New Sarepta (aka middle of nowhere) and I saw a sign saying you provide high speed internet out here. Me: Yep. We have a tower in town there. Guy: So how to you hook up? I haven't seen anyone running lines into here recently. Me: Well, you see sir, we don't use lines - we connect wirelessly from your house to our tower. Guy: WOW! Thats cool! So how much does this cost? Cause Bell (evil huge satellite company) says their going to charge me $800 to install, then $60/month and I have to keep my second phone line for uploads. Me: Yikes. Thats pretty high (quitely bash rival company). Our service costs $299.95 for the install and $39.95/month. Thats it. And you can get rid of your second phone line too since we don't use phone lines. Guy: What?? No phone line? Nice! OK, and I can be online any time I want? Me: Yeah. You see, you actually never go offline unless you turn off your computer. So you could surf for 88 hours straight and it would still cost $39.95. Guy: Well, thats great. So how long until I can get this? Me: You can phone in any time you like, ask for our salesperson (the real one, not me) and she will book you for an install. It is usually less than a week after you call. Then you'll have high speed internet. Guy: (Basicallly humping my leg) Thats excellent. I'll talk to my son and Im sure I will be calling very soon. Thank you very much. So I pretty much sold the guy, but I wont see one extra penny from the sale - the salespeople get that. Maybe I should go on strike.

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