Have you ever heard "coaching"? I took part in a workshop about it at work.

The instructors explained that "coaching" was a way to motivate people. A coach is on equal terms with a client and asks many questions. While answering the questions, a client finds his or her aim or what he or she should do. "Coaching" focuses on not past but future.

At first, the instructors gave a demonstration in order to show the importance of good communication. Communication is often compared to playing catch. We should throw a ball that a partner catches easily. In other words, we shouldn't throw a ball too strongly, nor should we throw balls one after another. It's obvious we can't catch such balls, but we tend to talk to our partners in one-sided way without thinking how they feel, right?

Then, we did an exercise in groups of three, a speaker, a listener and an observer. A speaker should talk candidly. A listener should accept what a speaker say and make him or her feel comfortable to talk. After a three-minute talk about a troublemaker, not his or her bad points but good points, an observer should tell a speaker about the speaker's goods points for a minute.

It was more interesting than I had expected. Surely, after listening to my observer's acknowledgement, I felt positive and found some keys to deal with my troublemaker from then on.

The instructor didn't forget give a meaningful suggestion to us, “When you regard a person as a troublemaker, I think he or she thinks you don't understand him or her at all.” It's really important for us to think about everything from another point of view. He added, "We should use the coaching skills as not just technically but mentally."

At the end of the workshop, I was chosen the one who experienced a coaching by the instructor. As I talked a lot, he asked me, "Does no one usually listen to you?" I answered, "No! I'm always too talkative. I think I should become a better listener." He asked again, "What will you do tonight in order to be a better listener?" I replied, "I'll listen to others to the end." He confirmed, "You'll listen to them to the end, won't you?"

Do I become a better listener? I've tried to be, but... It's much more difficult to do it than to say.