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I'm a single, 30-year-old male and a final year Ph.D. student at Notre Dame, originally from India. I am currently receiving a monthly stipend of $2,000 from my university. This summer, I've been fortunate to secure an internship in Seattle with an overall income of about $30,000 over 3 months (including a $8,000 relocation stipend).

Previously, I faced challenges in successfully completing the Financial Peace University (FPU) course. However, since last year, I've committed to managing my finances better. I've settled my consumer debt (which included purchases such as an Apple Watch, AirPods Pro, iPad Pro, and laptop) and started aggressively paying off my credit cards through the debt snowball method. After a slight misstep, witnessing the first set of interest charges reinvigorated my resolve, and I managed to close my final credit card within three months.

A close friend of mine, also a Ph.D. student, recently faced financial difficulty. I initially considered assisting him by paying off his $4,500 credit card debt, with the agreement that he would repay me $500 per month. I extended $500 to him upon receipt of my relocation stipend.

In discussing these developments with my parents, I learned that my father has been managing a $10,000 college student loan on my behalf for the last decade, with about $2k remaining. Additionally, he has covered my round-trip flight expenses to India, totaling around $4,000. Given my improved financial position, I intend to take responsibility for these debts.

After recently listening to the Total Money Makeover audiobook, I'm questioning my decision to loan money to my friend, as it may lead to tension in our relationship. Also, with the recent revelation of an additional $6k in debt, I'm not in a position to provide the financial help initially planned.

So, my question to you all: How can I convey to my friend that I am unable to provide financial assistance, not out of lack of concern, but out of fear that it could strain our friendship? Alternatively, could I be overthinking this situation?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts and advice.