How you die
I went to an orthopedic hospital this morning.It was astonishingly crowded.I spent nearly 3 hours waiting.While I was sitting in the waiting room, I read an essay 'がんばらない'.The author is a famous doctor Minoru Kamata and I borrowed it from my office library.I read 1/3 of the book and it is about his hospital in Nagano and his patients, the meaning of life and death, and quality of life.As I turned the pages, I was reviewing my life.Am I living fully?Am I wasting my time complaining and grumbling?Am I ready to die tomorrow?The book tells you that designing your own death is as important as how you live.If I was given 3 months to live, what would I do?The patients in the book go back and forth among suffering, anger, depression and acceptance, but every single person finishes their lives with appreciation in the end. I am not ready to die, of course.However, I must realize I am accepted and allowed being myself by my family, friends and many people around me.I must remember that.